Christmas Eve

   The semester flew by and I hardly wrote anything here at all. That wouldn't be an inappropriate entry on my tombstone, either. Last semester I had Theory of Computation and Software Engineering. Both were fun classes, and I learned a lot. I managed a C in Theory, and balanced it with an A in Engineering to get my minimum 3.0 gpa and stay in Grad school. I really must have aced the finals to do that well. I did feel good about them. I'll just enjoy it for now and not look too closely at my grades' teeth. This also means that I get to be appointed to a full-time Teaching Assistantship which is a really big deal for me. It means an Out-of-State tuition waiver, plus a small stipend in cash. This is so going on my CV. Money has been tight this year. Things are looking up.
   So here it is, Christmas eve. I'm having to think about the actual  meaning of Christmas, because most of the cultural trappings are out of reach. Our kids are all here, which is great, but we have no money to spend on them. If Colleen hadn't found a way to cobble together a "tree" out of cardboard and twigs, there wouldn't even be that. No over the river, no through the woods, no presents. We have a roof over our heads, and we have enough food, but we're missing a good bit of what it's common to do. I was tempted to think of it as me just being childish, and okay, that's probably part of it, but also I've started to think of it as Santa's phantom limb. It's missing and it hurts.
   We'll try to have a merry Christmas anyway. In private conversations I've been saying that we're going to do like the Whos down in Whoville, after the Grinch had made off with all of their stuff: we're going to get up in the morning and sing. Sing praise to our King. He has come to be with us, and he is very welcome. He hasn't solved all of our problems, but he has solved our really big one, which kind of makes the little ones moot. ( I had a class, back at Fox, in writing for Christian publications. I got a really bad grade. Probably all three of you who are going to read this are going to understand.) All Praise and Glory and Thanks be to God Almighty, maker of Heaven and earth, who loves us, and came to us and spoke to us, and gave himself as a ransom for many. There's no gift exchange going on here, there's nothing we can bring him that isn't His already. I clearly don't know when or even how to stop. It's alright, I'm not tired of saying it.
Merry Christmas.